An Unlikely Path from Con Alley to the Pulpit

About The Podcast

As a troubled youth who got picked up at age 12 for smoking pot and inadvertently setting a building on fire, Allen Bonnell was an unlikely candidate to become one of southeast Kentucky’s most successful and charismatic pastors. He talks with friend (and former colleague) Nate Dewberry about his improbable journey, the importance of making marriage a partnership, and what he’s learned about helping people discover the true nature of Christ’s love for themselves.

Show Notes

Timestamps

Discussion

1. What kind of role models did your family members provide for you—not only your parents but also siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins? What sort of grounding did they provide you in terms of morals? What about spiritual guidance? How is that reflected in the person you are today? 1 Timothy 4:12-13, Proverbs 1:8
2. More specifically, who have been your role models in terms of relationships? Who were your relationship role models when you were young, and what values or lessons—good or bad—did you pick up from them? What about later on in life? Allen says it’s a good idea to have an older couple in your circle of friends who have a healthy, loving marriage and can serve as your “marriage mentors”—do you and your spouse have a couple like that in your lives? If not, who are some couples who could potentially serve as those mentors, and what do you admire about them or their relationship? Proverbs 22:1
3. What’s a passion or interest of yours that you were originally introduced to by a friend? Was it something you instantly enjoyed, or did it take some time for you to learn about it and appreciate it? What kind of role has that friend played in your life?
4. What kind of learner are you? Do you appreciate having a teacher or mentor who’s hands-on and always there to provide help and guidance? Or do you prefer less involvement and more independence, finding satisfaction in coming to discoveries on your own? What are the discoveries you’ve made on your own that have brought you the most personal satisfaction?
5. Allen and Nate both talk about the importance of “learning” or “being a student of” your spouse. How much have you learned about your spouse over the course of your relationship? What were some things you learned early on in that relationship that were challenging for you to understand or appreciate? What are some things that have proved particularly rewarding to learn?
6. What’s a pastime, hobby, or interest you and your spouse or partner have picked up together? How did you acquire this interest? What are some benefits you’ve gained from this pastime that you might not have gained if you were pursuing it on your own?
7. Allen goes into detail about the need to “deny the self” in a committed relationship. What are some things you’ve had to deny yourself to keep your current relationship loving and harmonious? They can be material things or activities, but they can also be abstract and emotional, such as anger about certain things, preconceived ideas, or even grudges. What have been the hardest things for you to give up or abstain from? What are some things you think your spouse has denied herself for you? Philippians 2:3

Additional Resources:

A Long Obedience in the Same Direction: Discipleship in an Instant Society by Eugene H. Peterson