More About The Podcast
- About
- Show Notes
About
This week, The Redeemed Man podcast welcomes back one of its very first guests, licensed counselor and minister Michael Cusick, to talk about his new book Sacred Attachments. In his conversation with Nate Dewberry, Michael explains what attachment means, why it matters, and how the bonds we form, or fail to form, early in life can shape us as adults. He also highlights the importance of openness and honesty, how to guard against “spiritual exhaustion,” and what it means to embrace a “re-imagined” life with God—one marked not by constant activity, but by rest and security in His love.
Show Notes
Segment chapters
0:00 Intro/What inspired Michael’s latest book
3:19 What does attachment mean, and why is it important?
11:51 The “Four S’s” critical to a child’s healthy emotional development
15:32 How our sacred attachment to God helps us “exhale” in times of stress and shame
24:26 The truth will set you free—not just the truth of the Bible, but what’s in our own hearts
32:11 God meets us where we’re broken, so let’s be willing to admit where that is
41:38 How God rescues us: the story of Juan Cruz
Snippets/excerpts
6:43 to 8:45—Michael explains the attachment process and the lifelong negative impact that can result from a disrupted process
13:09 to 14:37—Michael uses a story from his childhood to illustrate what it means to be “soothed” and how there can be soothing even in an otherwise dysfunctional household
17:11 to 19:14—“The sacred attachment is the exhale”: How the unique nature of our relationship with God gives us a chance to block out the voices of shame and inadequacy
22:37 to 24:25—If you’re living your Christian life and it still feels heavy, maybe it’s not Jesus you’re listening to
28:49 to 30:39—These days, it’s easier for many men to confess sexual sin than to talk about their true needs or longings
34:06 to 35:51—A real man is someone who can search within himself and admit he’s struggling
Discussion
- Michael opens by touching on his work as a counselor, helping people “close the gap” between the Christian life they hoped for and the reality they’re living. Have you ever felt that kind of disconnect? Where do you sense the biggest gap right now in your own spiritual journey?
- Of the four attachment styles Michael discusses—avoidant, anxious, ambivalent, and secure—which one most accurately describes you and/or the most important relationship in your life (i.e., with a spouse)? In what ways might that attachment style be hindering you in your efforts to connect with other people?
- Now discuss the “four S’s”—seen, soothed, safe, and secure—that young kids need to experience to develop emotionally and build healthy connections with others. To what degree do you feel like those needs were met in your childhood? What’s a specific memory from your childhood in which you recall one of those needs being properly met? Do you feel like there was an “S” that you lacked as a child, and if so, do you notice ways in which that lack has created obstacles to your attachments with others as an adult?
- Do you ever find yourself relating to God the same way you would another person – almost transactionally, as if you have to keep working to earn his love, or as if he has to somehow prove himself to you? Is it difficult to view your relationship with God as the sacred and unique bond that Michael describes—one in which you never have to worry about being abandoned or condemned? Romans 8:1
- Have you recently experienced what Michael describes as “spiritual exhaustion”—the sense that you’re constantly having to work to earn or maintain God’s favor? Are those expectations coming from God, or are they coming from someone or something else?
- Think about a recent sexual sin. Now think about the deep-seated needs and longings you have regarding relationships. Which would you be more comfortable discussing with the rest of your group? Why?
- Who was the last person who really asked you where you were hurting or what felt broken in your life? Was it someone you can generally count on to have concern for you, or did that concern come from an unexpected place? When they asked, how open were you willing to be—did you find yourself holding anything back? If so, what kept you from sharing fully?
Other resources
Sacred Attachment: Escaping Spiritual Exhaustion and Trusting in Divine Love by Michael Cusick


