We live in a culture obsessed with self-indulgence. From the moment we wake up, we’re told we deserve more: more comfort, more success, more experiences, more stuff. Bigger is better. Newer is necessary. If something feels hard, inconvenient, or uncomfortable, we’re encouraged to avoid it or upgrade out of it. The message is constant and convincing: you owe it to yourself.
One of the most iconic parts of the Christmas season is the lights. They’re everywhere: on our houses, wrapped around our trees, lining our streets. But for a lot of men, all the brightness on the outside only highlights how dark things feel on the inside. We know the world is broken. We feel the weight of our own failures. And no matter how many lights we hang, they can’t hide the truth that sometimes life feels pitch black.
We wake to alarms, rush through coffee, fight traffic, answer emails, juggle meetings, pick up the kids, mow the lawn, scroll ourselves to sleep, and then wake up and do it all over again. But beneath the hum of productivity and performance, most of us are bone-tired. Our souls are weary.
Conflict is unavoidable. Whether at home, at work, in friendships, or even within the church, we all face moments of disagreement and tension. Unfortunately, when it comes to conflict, our culture normalizes unhealthy responses, sometimes teaching that the loudest, angriest voice wins, and other times, justifying quiet resentment and passive-aggressive behavior. But Jesus shows us another way. A better way. Conflict is not about overpowering others or passively withdrawing, but about tapping into God’s truth, peace, and strength whenever it arises.
Recently on The Redeemed Man Podcast, we had the privilege of sitting down with our friend TJ Mackenzie, a relationship coach and licensed therapist with Refined Iron. TJ specializes in helping men navigate the hard places in marriage with hope, resilience, and practical tools. He doesn’t just speak theory, he’s lived through struggles, mistakes, and redemption, and now equips men to find connection and restoration where it often feels impossible.
We live in an age where advice is endless, but true wisdom is rare. From well-meaning family and friends to bestselling self-help authors and polished social media influencers, wisdom seems to be everywhere. Don’t be fooled though. Not all wisdom is equal. In fact, Scripture makes it clear that when it comes to seeking wisdom, there are two competing sources at work: wisdom that comes from the world and wisdom that comes from God.
As men, we often pride ourselves on what we know. We devour books and podcasts, sharpen our skills, and chase information, believing it will make us stronger, more capable, more complete. And yet, even as knowledge helps us achieve more, many of us still feel a nagging emptiness inside. Why? Because knowledge alone was never meant to be our highest pursuit. It sharpens the mind, but it doesn’t shape the heart. It helps us make a living, but it can’t teach us how to truly live. What every man needs is godly wisdom — the kind that not only informs our decisions but transforms our character. Without it, we end up smart but not steady, informed but not truly wise. Knowledge may provide us good information, but wisdom is what helps us apply it. The truth is simple but life-changing: Wisdom will always take us further than knowledge – and here’s why:
As Christian men, we’re in a battle. Not one marked by bullets, but by soul-threatening enemies like temptation, spiritual apathy, fear, and isolation. The war we fight is unseen, but the stakes are eternal, making it all the more critical that we surround ourselves with brothers who refuse to let any man fall behind.
Maybe you’ve been there — full calendar, empty soul. You’re surrounded by people at work, church, and home, yet you feel isolated and perhaps even unknown. As men, we’re quick to exchange handshakes and conversation about our interests and hobbies, but when it comes to building soul-level connections, many of us keep our distance. It feels too risky, so we settle for shallow — and we suffer for it. But God’s vision for masculine friendship calls us to go deeper. It’s not just about company; it’s about commitment. It’s not just about hanging out, but helping one another become more like Christ. Scripture gives us a picture of brotherhood where men sharpen each other, speak truth in love, stand firm through hardship, and refuse to let one another drift.
Psalm 107:2
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